The Voice of Rin Kagamine
by Asxcala
Summary: When Rin realizes the pointlessness in her existence she begins to block herself from everyone and becomes extremely depressed and antisocial. Can her best friend Miki giving Rin her voice back save the young Kagamine


The Voice of Rin Kagamine

Rin Kagamine wouldn't sing. It was as simple as that. Rin had permanently refused to sing a single note for the rest of her life. She had completely closed herself off from all of the other Vocaloids too. She refused to speak unless she had a good reason.

Her friends had noticed and had decided to ignore her from that point foreword. But Rin had no power to stop them seeing as her voice was closed off from the world's ears. After about a month of this she had decided to not speak much either. Not to her best friend Miki, not to her brother Len, not even to her loving parents.

And Rin remained that way. Locking herself in her room with her favorite _Skylar Grey_ and _Christina Perry_ hits blasting down the halls. Nothing made her happy anymore. Not even when her best friend got a new job or a date with a great guy. Not when her friend passed an exam or saved up enough money for a new anime box set.

Miki had done all of this over the course of that year and Rin couldn't help but dismiss her friend from her room and blare her music again every time.

Rin couldn't help but be this way. And by the time the year ended, Rin stopped talking to her parents and friends all together. She was aware that her lifelong friend was worried about her but she didn't care, nothing made her happy anymore and there was nothing she could do about it.

…

Miki was worried as all hell about Rin. But what could she do? Her friend refused to see her anymore or to let a Miki see her, it was so frustrating! Rin had been her friend since they had been made it wasn't right for her lifelong companion to feel such pain. She was walking down the red tiled halls when she heard it again. It started off as a small instrumental opening, and then it was cranked all the way to top volume when the lyrics started flowing. Miki sighed sadly, the pain in the lyrics of the song, was Rin really feeling this broken? She stood there frozen for a long time, letting the discordant lyrics wash over her.

"_Even when I'm walking on the wire. _

_Even when I set myself on fire. _

_Why do I always feel In-visible, invisible?_

…_Every day I try to look my best._

_Even though Inside I'm such a mess._

_Why do I always feel in-visible, invisible?_"

It _killed_ Miki to hear the sorrow in this new song. Poor Rin, Rin was like a sister to Miki, her family! She never wanted her to feel this hurt in her life. But what could Miki do?

She'd already tried buying her the new volume of _Vampire Knight, _Rin had let Miki put it on her dresser then never even touch it. Her friend had tried buying her red velvet cake from the new bakery across town. It had smelled heavenly and Miki had put it in a special pink package. But she had walked in to pick up the plate that afternoon and the cake stayed in the package untouched with her beloved friend hugging her knees on the other side of her room. She was like a bird with no voice.

Miki's eyes widened in realization. That _was _what Rin was… and what she needed! Miki would buy her friend a song bird, it was genius! With a pet bird in her room singing pretty songs to her friend, maybe Rin would come out of her shell a little. Rin loved music, and animals, it was perfect! Miki started running down the hall a great plan in her mind that could be the only way to save her friend.

…

Rin was ashamed. She was a coward and she knew it. Miki was only trying to help her and she had refused to let her. Miki was important and she hadn't meant to hurt her feelings but she just… couldn't anymore.

She wanted nothing more than to leave her room and taste the fresh autumn air, to walk to the ocean with Miki and sink her bare feet in the sand. But more than anything… she wanted to smile, or to see her friend smile at her.

She wanted to see the cherry haired girl make a simple joke about _anything _and just fall to the ground and laugh and smile again like they used to. Sometimes she fantasized it, her friend with an ear to ear grin just about to give in and laugh her heart out, her wide eyes shining like evening stars and her cheeks a rosy pink. And her laugh as smooth as silk, pure and a gift to your ears.

But Rin knew her friend would never smile at her again as long as she felt this ache inside. It was as if something was missing, something important in her life wasn't there. It was a terrible feeling. And the music she now listened to fit how she felt perfectly. She found no better person to describe her condition than _Avril Lavigne, Skylar Grey _or _Paramore_. Rin was aware of her ribs that stuck out from her not eating well for weeks. It had gotten so hard for her to be living that she had stopped eating and decided she never would again.

She was also aware of the dark bags under her now clouded eyes from lack of sleep. Whenever she used to walked over to her bed and got under the new gray comforter to get some sleep. She always gave in to the emptiness inside her heart, knowing that if she did drift into sleep she would awaken feeling no better or more satisfied than she had felt before she had fallen asleep. So she began to ask what the point was and decided to stop trying to sleep all together and just plug in her headphones and turn up her depressing music once again.

Rin got up dropping the pillow she'd been clutching between her face and knees and walked into the bathroom. She flicked on the lowest powered lights and turned the shower faucet to the frigid temperature she had woken up to for the past months. She walked across the tile floor, stripping as she walked not caring about her scattered clothes or anyone coming in to see her not even if that person was Gakupo as long as he left quickly after.

Rin yanked away the black shower curtain she had used to replace her fluffy pink one she had kept on her shower a year ago. Now that curtain was in a storage box in her closet, with all of her other old things that once gave her joy and contained bright, vibrant colors. _Gone with my heart _Rin had thought when placing her pink stuffed rabbit in the storing bock and taping it shut. She remembered Miki seeing what she'd done and telling her "_But Rin that was the gift I gave you when you helped me write my first original song!" _

Rin didn't remember what happened next, just that that stuffed silk rabbit was still in the top box in her closet. Rin shivered once only taking a second to adjust to the freezing shower spray. She hadn't used hot or even warm water for months.

She remembered how nice a hot bath used to feel. Miki would even come in sometimes and sit beside her while Rin was under the bubbles and steaming water. Miki used to sink her hand in the water, grab some bubble suds and throw it at Rin's face and Miki would laugh. Rin could only hold a straight face for a moment then, before grinning ear to ear and joining in on her friend's laughter.

Rin shook the thought away letting the heatless water stream down her nose and hit the shower tiles. Not bothering to lift her head as the liquid fled and ran down the drain. Rin let her once bright now achromic hair wilt lifelessly to rest at her shoulders. The lyrics to her song outside the curtain her mouth began singing the memorized lyrics along with the CD.

"_All the memories… _

_That we're losing… _

_All the time that I spent with you every day,_

_I think it's running down the drain._

_I'm feeling…_

_That we're fading…_

_Don't make this as hard as you think it would be,_

_It's a lot easier than it seems, Yeah, yeah... _"

Rin was interrupted by a knock on the door outside her room. Rin didn't even blink as Miki knock once again then entered her room anyway.

"Rin?" Rin didn't move as the bathroom door slid open and the sound of Miki's boots coming closer to the shower could be heard even over the music, Rin had always hated Miki's boots, they were always so loud!

"Rin, are you okay?" Rin didn't respond. Miki sighed hopelessly and slid back the shower curtain a few inches. Rin didn't meet her eye as Miki gasped in horror Rin guessed it was her visible ribs that had shocked her friend. Miki reached for the knob to turn off the shower and her hand shot back at her side like she'd been bitten. Miki put a finger under the water her eyes widening in shock.

Miki's eyes filled with tears and she fell to the floor, hands covering her eyes as her spine bent foreword. Tears leaked through her fingers and Rin just kept her gaze on the floor, eyes glazed over with lack of emotion.

Miki couldn't help but cry. It was worse than she had feared.

Her friend didn't even feel anymore.

TBC

**Writer's Note- This story was written for The Queen of Double Standards (Not as a request). Yes, there are one or two more chapters after this one to complete the story. The song lyrics are not my own, they belong to **_**Skylar Grey**_** and **_**Avril Lavigne. The first set of lyrics is from Skylar Grey's Invisible. The second set is from Avril Lavigne's Not Enough. Thanks For reading! **_


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